The Verdict is in...

I got my professional critique of my screen play back and there were alot of things to think about. I pretty much didn't push hard enough. All in all they said it to be a so-so piece.

-They said the plot was weak. (particularly the second act)

-The central theme wasn't strong enough and although there was conflict it didn't start early enough for the characters to develop.

-The title although catchy didn't tell anything of the story and needs to be changed.

-Too much slang for one of the characters.

-The homosexual character is too offensive and needs to be changed.

-The secondary characters are to broad and flat.

-The log line is good, but needs pushed, and the synopsis is good, but needs shortened.

-Dialogue needs shortened. More character interaction.

Now with all that being said, there were some outstanding points to remember. This is the most professional, unbiased opinion I have had of any creative endeavor I have ever had. For this being my first screen play I consider it to be a good starting off point. Everything they said was 100% right on the money. I am going to take every ounce of criticism and apply it to my script. I want this to be a polished work worthy of earning power.

They did love my characters, so my character development is pretty good, though there is always room for improvement. They like my strong visual sense of writing. Everything that is problematic I think I can fix. This project isn't quite out of the realm of possible completion. I am confident that I can succeed.

I will put all other projects on hold until this screen play is complete.