I wake up this morning not in the best of moods and while I normally don't post this early I have nothing else to do being that I am stuck in the middle of nowhere, Ohio. Somewhere between the farmlands and the limbo of society called Pataskala (pronounced Pa-task-a-la). A place where shut-ins and homophobes dwell. Where the culture less find piece in their ignorance. The kind of place one drives through and has to stop for gas at the local truck stop and wonders," Who the hell are all these people eating at the truck stop?"
Well, quite honestly... My mom and her boyfriend. They love eating at the local truck stop to hangout with the locals. Or as my mom's boyfriend puts it "Gear Jammers". I have determined that I am not better than them.,nor am I pretentious enough to think there is nothing viable to learn from these aristocrats of Jerry Springer genetics and Oprah wisdom. However, what does get my goat metaphorically speaking... Although I do believe that if I did have a goat I might have to protect it with my life like a sixteen year old virgin from a crew of sailors that have been out to sea for months. Is that they have such condescending attitudes as to what they think is right and the norm.
That is where my sense of pretentiousness begins to develop. When someone with a 4th grade education begins to make side comments as to the choices of other human beings I begin to lose all respect for that person as a person.
Ignorance doesn't breed hate. From what I have witnessed. Ignorance breeds overweight, under educated degenerates that would be better off sterilized and given remedial jobs that cater to the needs of people who are actually worth a damn. Then again these geniuses are also the one's that can't function in the least even at such easy jobs as flipping burgers or being parking garage attendants. They somehow screw these jobs up much like everything else in their lives and it all boils down to one common denominator.
Lack of quality. Lack of personal dignity. Or lack of personal responsibility. Any one of these concepts seems to run fluent through their beings of disgust. From their chubby, greasy little ignorant consumerist muffin paws to their celebrity worship and complete misinterpretation of religious ideas. Somewhere in the United States right now probably next door to where I am is someone drinking Mountain Dew out of a 2- liter stuffing their 300 pound fatness with cookies and cream ice cream. As they stuff their droopy eyes with daytime television fug-ugliness.
In my daily routine it is 11am right now. By this time I would have been to gym for an hour stretching, lifting weights, and ran around 2 miles. Then I would have fixed my daily breakfast of an entire weeks worth of fruit or what most Americans eat in a month.
- 3 apples' skins
- 25 green grapes
- 25 purple grapes
- 1 or 2 oranges
- a handful of blueberries ( 2 ounces)
- a handful of raspberries (2 ounces)
- strawberries or blackberries.
- possibly cantaloupe
- around 4 ounces of walnuts
I would consume this while listening to my self taught 30 minutes of Mandarin on CD. Which I must say is coming along nicely. Then I would change clothes and begin to start my day of painting in the garage/ studio. And it would just now be about eleven or so.
Instead! I am sitting here drinking a Coca Cola typing this blog of dissidents because I woke up in the middle of nowhere-ville, USA at ten in the morning. I decided to go bare foot to the bathroom where I stepped in dog piss which happens to be the norm in this household as the carpets are soaked with animal fecal matter and urine. I never go bare foot. But, I thought," Hey! Maybe today will be different." It's not. So as I sit on the toilet looking at my foot just hoping the pungent aroma will fade I debate as to whether or not wash my foot off.
One would think this to be an easy decision. Yet, when one takes into account the fact that they have well water which is harder than a lifer in Riker's it's a tough decision. If you have ever smelled rotten eggs and then amplified that with skunk pheromone. One would begin to understand my dilemma. I decide to just let the urine stay. I wipe it of with a towel. Which doesn't do anything really. It was dirty as well.
Then of course I get up and the toilet doesn't flush. I pull the handle and nothing. Not clogged. Not broken. Just nothing. Like it is a display toilet. The water just sort of moves around and the tank fills up again. By this point I have given up on my day. I now see how people give up on life here. Light doesn't penetrates the windows. The dogs use the interior as their defecation zone. You cannot drink the water it is so rank.
The water is the quality of 3rd world nations. I never cook here for fear of dysentery if I use the water for anything. Which means allot when one starts to add it up. I can brush my teeth,but I can't rinse. I have to use mouth wash to rinse. Spit it out a couple of times. Then I just have to drink a little to get the rest of the taste out of my mouth...Yummy! It gets better. I can't taken a shower because it looks like Swamp Thing exploded. Plus, who wants to get out of the shower and smell worse than going in. I made the mistake of washing my hair in it once. Once! The rest of the day my hair was permeated with the smell of rotten eggs. Then there is the fact that the smell is so bad that I have to breathe through my mouth so I cannot smell it. That leaves my mouth open for the taste to get in. God forbid. So, I am constantly spitting out water while trying not to breathe. Showers get boiled down to once a week maybe twice. And they last no longer than 5 minutes at most. Then it takes ten minutes to dry in order to get the stink water off completely.
I try to keep my visits here to no overnights, but sometimes I am held captive at my mom's convenience since I don't drive, but hopefully that all changes.
This is my eleventh dimension. Nothing makes sense. Nothing works as it should. I have seen how far the rabbit hole goes. The darkest days without light at the end of the tunnel. Where hope is lost. Where motivation and drive are pummeled to death with cable television, Dvds, and a Lazy Boy recliner that is on it's last leg. A place where dreams fall dead on their faces and drowned in pools of dog urine. Where ignorance breeds hording and where hording breeds more hording.
To me this is the epitome of what American culture has truly become in essence. A commercialized collection of consumerism want over need. Mine over yours. The " I am so much cooler because I got the new 5.0 version" which is exactly the same as the old version just a different color and slimmed down. To bad our culture is not slimmed down and cooler.
In this eleventh dimension I have become the minority. A 30 year old male that exercises daily, has no set schedule of daily television programming I "must see", and I eat a bowl of fruit for breakfast. In my true search to always stand out amongst the crowd and be a true individual I am now led to a life of simplicity and health. Both of the mind and body. As America becomes a country of tolerant, ignorant, and dumbed down laziness I find it now more than ever important to be fully aware of everything. To keep my mind sharp and my body sharper.
As an artist that makes social commentary on a culture that simply has no appreciation for it I must keep the battle for the few, the proud, the creative, the motivated. Those whom still place imagination and creativity as important as science and mathematics. Although those too seem to be suffering greater appreciation these days with the public educational system here the equivalent of a cigarette butt that stays caught in the pee pad trap of a urinal. Always soaked and on edge of dissolving down the drain. Something which shouldn't have been there in the first place.
Our society is losing our edge of greatness for lack of caring. We have become more enthralled with wanting to be famous and obsessed with our pursuit of happiness, but not actually wanting to get up and work for it. To understand that with happiness comes the struggle that is where our culture is failing. People think that happiness is inherit with our right of being American. That we deserve to be happy. No one deserves happiness. It is earned. Through hard work, proper planning, motivation, and drive. True happiness comes from an observance of true self worth. If one cannot take care of one's self both physically and mentally then one will never truly be happy.
This is why fat people will never truly be happy. I am not being mean or selfish. Or maybe I am, but some people need tough love. It is hard work to be healthy. It is hard work to be smart. Achieving success is something that is not handed to those faint of heart. True success is not necessarily measured through money or materialism. The measure of true success is the opinion of one's self worth. This means different things to different things to different people.
Sometimes I get caught up in what I don't have and I what I wish I had, but in reality detaching from the materialistic world has given a greater perspective on many things. Yes, I sacrifice some in essence and my life is more of a pain having to deal with other people and their issues. However, I see far too many people who's possessions own them. Their computers run their existence instead of it being a tool to help accentuate their life. It becomes their life. Not knowing how to drive makes everything in my life way more difficult. Then again, I see so many people who pour so much money into their cars that it becomes their identity. Without their car they feel anonymous. these were meant as means of transportation, but have become elements to which people work their job for. They have to work tons of hours to pay for their materialistic desires.
I am not saying I don't like nice things, but when one's desire for items one can't afford jeopardize one's ability to have a life outside of theses items. It becomes time to question whether the life style is appropriate.
My life is not for the faint of heart and often taxes my beliefs as well. For instance, I have maybe 3 or 4 major elements of ownership. Clothes, stereo, old TV, Xbox 360, and art supplies. That is it. And some books. Nothing more. Sure I would like more. Not much more. A fish tank might be nice sometime. That will be eventually my milestone for where ever I decide to settle down for a couple of years. Until then these are my essentials. I want allot more stuff sure. Do I need more things. No. When I have more money will I buy more things. Possibly. Not much though. I believe in owning things and not letting them own you. That is my idea on this whole American stigma. This frame of mind that the general public has, needs to change because it's getting us nowhere fast and we are starting to see the backlash for all this consumerism over our basic needs for education and hard work. That's it for me today. I'm all blogged out from the head up.
RANT IS OVER. WHEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I feel better ... At least for now. Oh,, and by the way all that stuff I said is just talk...Unless you hear what I'm saying.
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